Be Fair In Your Relationships By Doing This

2 Corinthians 6:11 – We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians, and opened wide our hearts to you.

2 Corinthians 6:12 – We are not withholding our affection from you, but you are withholding yours from us.

2 Corinthians 6:13 – As a fair exchange—I speak as to my children —open wide your hearts also.

It is important to be fair in your relationships because God is watching and He is the ultimate judge of our actions on earth. For God’s sake be fair to each other. Fairness means that the bare minimum you should do in a relationship is what the other person has done for you. Return the favour, it’s only fair.

However, Jesus taught us to go beyond. If someone forces you to go one mile, go a second one. While fair is the bare minimum, a believer will go beyond fair in how they relate with others. Be more than fair in your relationships.

Relationships are many and varied. Parent – child relationship. Husband – wife relationship. Employer – employee relationship. Whatever relationship requires fairness. Be fair in your relationships, actually be more than fair!

Without fairness, you will be abusing the other partner in the relationship. Therefore for fairness sake, be fair, actually more than fair in your relationships. Is that too much to ask yet the other person has already made a contribution and yours is to respond? Be fair!

Apostle Paul wrote our Bible passage today to Corinthians and he was speaking on behalf of other leaders he was with. He tells Corinthians that they have been open to them and have not withheld any affection. However, the Corinthians have been unfair. The Corinthians were not open to the leaders and they withheld their affection. Apostle paul appeals to them to be fair!

Don’t proceed into a permanent relationship with someone who isn’t fair to you. That relationship will be abusive. If you are the one initiating communication, plans, direction and you seem to resolve problems, and they contribute nothing, it’s not fair. If it’s not fair, it’s not safe.

If you do not communicate, they will never communicate, its not fair. If you don’t solve a challenge you are experiencing, it will never be solved because the other party will not initiate, it’s not fair. if you don’t initiate they will never initiate, it’s not fair.

Apostle Paul asks Corinthians to be fair. Are you fair? He tells the Corinthians to open up as they did. When someone opens up, you secure them by opening up, otherwise they will feel anxious that they may have opened up too much. Be fair by responding in equal measure.

I read a story online today that demonstrates fairness. A well to do family would sometimes go and borrow salt or a matchbox or a broom from a less fortunate family that lived close by. The daughter of the well to do family asked the mother why she went borrowing what they had and or don’t need. The mother told her that they borrowed so that the family feels they are not the only one borrowing. The less fortunate family would borrow regularly from the well to do family. In order to be fair so that they don’t feel guilty out of their regular borrowing, the well to do family also would borrow from the less fortunate family. They would borrow what the others could afford. They would borrow late at night or during extreme weather so that they seem to have been assisted. That created a fair situation. That is fairness!

The onus to be fair is on the one who has an upper hand in the relationship. The wealthier or richer has an upper hand. The older and wiser has an upper hand. The one with a higher rank has an upper hand. The teacher has an upper hand over the student. The clergy have an upper hand over the laity in spiritual matters. The offended has an upper hand over the guilty. If you have the upper hand, act fair!

If a favour has been done for you, take note that you owe the one who did the favour. If someone greets you, you owe the person a response. If someone expresses love, you need to stop them or respond by also expressing love for them. Relationships require fairness. Act fairly and treat each other with fairness.

Matthew 5:46 – If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that?

Matthew 5:47 – And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?

In this passage in Matthew Jesus was encouraging us to love our enemies and not only friends. That did not forbid us from loving and being fair to those we are in a relationship with. Our focus today is not on enemies but those we are with in a relationship already. Enemies must be treated in a good way that they do not deserve. Friends and those we are with in a relationship should be treated fairly. Are you fair?

May God help us to treat others in a better way than they have treated us. May fairness be our mode of operation. Be fair to others for God’s sake. In Jesus’s name, Amen!

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