A Serious Red Flag In Any Relationship

Jeremiah 6:10 – To whom can I speak and give warning? Who will listen to me? Their ears are closed so they cannot hear. The word of the LORD is offensive to them; they find no pleasure in it.

A red flag is a warning sign that there is danger ahead. A red flag tells you to make changes before you lose. A red flag tells you to run away before you get hurt. Anyone who ignores red flags will always regret.

Early in a relationship when prospects of a happy life are all we think about, we ignore many red flags. Our nature of being in denial when it seems things won’t work as we wished causes us to deliberately ignore red flags. Naivety and foolishness can also cause us to ignore red flags.

When a relationship has ended and we are reflecting, we often notice that there were red flags we ignored. A relationship that ended due to violence, must have had red flags of violence that we excused. We excused the red flags by thinking it’s normal anger. We even blamed ourselves as having triggered it. Yet it was a red flag that we ignored. Many have died in violent relationships because they ignored red flags.

Whatever ends any relationship always has advanced red flags. We suffer because we ignore the flags. The flags come so that we attend to the problems while they are small and manageable. The flags come so that we can make it clear to our partners that this cannot be tolerated. Once they get used to bad behavior, stopping is difficult or impossible, the earlier the better. Yet we ignore the red flags.

Communication problems that break relationships have red flags very early. Infidelity has red flags very early and all along the relationship. Money problems that break relationships have red flags early in the relationship. In-law problems have red flags very early in the relationships. Unfortunately we ignore hoping the problems will just disappear. Unfortunately we ignore blaming ourselves or fearing it will destabilize the relationship. Eventually it breaks the relationship.

In parenting, children come with red flags. A drug abusing child sends many red flags. Suspicious smell, we ignore. Disappearance from home without explanation, we ignore. Changing behavior of being unkempt, dropping performance, etc., but we ignore or excuse it. Sometimes we pretend like we are addressing it, but we don’t do it firmly enough or early enough to make the desired changes. Eventually in regret we look back and see all the red flags.

A bad worker will always have red flags from the point of interview, probation and employment. When eventually the worker harms the organization, the red flags would have been ignored in abundance. Any red flag that is ignored will be seen clearly in regret.

Our Bible text today tells us that Israelites were so sinful that they were punished by being sent to Babylonian slavery. The red flag the Israelites showed was that the word of God became offensive to them. God’s people found no pleasure in listening to God. This was and still is a very serious red flag!

You belong to God, yet any word from God offends you? You claim to be in a relationship with God, yet you find no pleasure in His words? Yet communication is the heartbeat of every relationship? Yet words of a loved one are most cherished in a relationship? Now the words offend you? This is a very serious red flag.

You are a believer but you are complaining more about the church than appreciating. You are a believer but you hate church leaders and fellow believers, except those in hating mode like you. Everything about the church is wrong and you feel you know better than everyone in church. This is a serious red flag that you are on your way out or on your way to support internal opposition.

You are a believer and after worship when others are excited about the just concluded worship, you feel nothing. You wonder what excites them. You feel clever and mature to get excited by such obvious singing and preaching. It’s a red flag, your heart is gone out of this worship and this God. You will soon be absent from worship.

When God’s word no longer excites you, you are losing your relationship with God. When God’s word offends you, be careful, He is no longer your friend. This is a red flag you need to attend to without postponing or creating excuses.

In any relationship, if communication from your partner offends you, be worried. Communication from him or her causes you anxiety, be worried. When even good and well intended communication irritates you and you are better off without it, be concerned. That is a very serious red flag.

When you feel good in a relationship when he or she doesn’t communicate, it’s a sign of trouble. When you avoid meeting to avoid communicating, you have a problem that should be urgently addressed. When you find no pleasure in anything your partner says, be very worried and address it. Red flags shouldn’t be ignored or else we regret.

Thank you God for the red flags. Help us to see them. Grant us wisdom and courage to address them in a timely manner, in Jesus’s name, Amen!

Someone you know will only know about this article if you share with them. Someone you know needs this article. Share this with one more person. Don’t copy the text. Copy THE LINK or send the website address which is reikesis.com so that they too read the word of God FROM THE WEBSITE and access more. YOU CAN COMMENT on this article at the bottom of the article. Also remember this author has a YouTube channel @ReiKesis which has hundreds of videos for you! Thanks for your loyal support of this ministry!